TERB Users

Hello fellow hobbyists and ladies,

I have a question about the "other" site. I am a member and I use the same name for both on purpose as there is a lot of crossover. I stand behind all of my comments on both boards. A while ago I was speaking to an SP (who I won't name) from this site through a CL ad. She asked for my CERB handle which I gave.

She also looked me up on TERB which is fine but then said "Frankly, I try to avoid men off terb"..."I gave up on terb long ago. I only use it now to help me determine who I will NOT see."

This struck me as really odd as I hadn't heard it before. Even more odd is that she mentions her TERB recommendations in her ad! I guess what I would like to know is how common this particular opinion is. I am not interested in limiting the amount of resources I use in this hobby. I, like many others, believe that a smart hobbyist should use multiple sources when deciding who to see. Would love some input.

Some terb members go over the line while many are honest yet respectful - it's possible to do both - and it's easy to tell who's worth listening to. Terb and cerb are both useful, just in different ways.

Hello fellow hobbyists and ladies,

 

I have a question about the "other" site. I am a member and I use the same name for both on purpose as there is a lot of crossover. I stand behind all of my comments on both boards. A while ago I was speaking to an SP (who I won't name) from this site through a CL ad. She asked for my CERB handle which I gave.

 

She also looked me up on TERB which is fine but then said "Frankly, I try to avoid men off terb"..."I gave up on terb long ago. I only use it now to help me determine who I will NOT see."

 

This struck me as really odd as I hadn't heard it before. Even more odd is that she mentions her TERB recommendations in her ad! I guess what I would like to know is how common this particular opinion is. I am not interested in limiting the amount of resources I use in this hobby. I, like many others, believe that a smart hobbyist should use multiple sources when deciding who to see. Would love some input.

Perhaps it is isolated, and just the opinion of one individual rather than a collective opinion from those on that site.

TERB is a review board as opposed to Lyla a recommendation board. However there are outstanding reviews on TERB as well as less glorious ones. If the lady provides a good service then she shouldn't worry about bad reviews. Personally, I would just thank her and move on, she probably saved me a few hundreds ;-)

I'm on both too, and for the same reasons as you. I'd pay no attention to it as I believe too, that it is an isolated incident.

TERB is a review board as opposed to Lyla a recommendation board. However there are outstanding reviews on TERB as well as less glorious ones. If the lady provides a good service then she shouldn't worry about bad reviews. Personally, I would just thank her and move on, she probably saved me a few hundreds ;-)

I didn't read in original post that she was getting bad reviews. I read that she has had it with ppl who frequent that board. Crude or not, my experience with terb guys is they carry that 'attitude' and hateful opinions outside of board matters in other words in their personal dealings with girls. I have been thinking about advertising there but their absolute hatred of all girls independent is almost scary. Would I be opening a whole new can of worms by putting myself back on their radar? Or can I hope to attract lurkers only? (I don't care about reviews but personal safety issues are my concern when it comes to that board)

So making assumptions is never the answer. Everybody has their own reasons. Assumptions have a habit of becoming 'fact' and if you know not of what you speak, you mess it up for the ppl who the assumptions are about

By simple luck I discovered Lyla first and never looked further. Because of this thread, I just wandered over to TERB to have a quick look, and in the first thread I checked, a member was referring to an sp whom he was giving a /favourable/ review as lacking the intelligence to carry on a conversation. Further posters discussed that comment at length, with evident amusement.

If providers respond with distaste to clients who think that sort of personal judgement is fine, I don't blame them in the slightest.

TERB serves a valuable function in my opinion. there have been times that I cannot find the information that I need or am looking for on CERB, yet find something (positive or negative) on TERB.

If an SP or MA is not recommended on CERB, is it because they are not good or has no one bothered to recommend them? I use TERB as a back resource especially with all the BP ads.

If someone does not want to see me because I am on TERB, that is their choice; likewise I can choose whom I want to see based on recommendations and reviews on both boards.

If someone is going to exclude you on the sole basis of being a member of a message board, and not the way in which you represent yourself, than was the meeting going to be all that good anyway?

I am one who tries to do my homework, and I must say that my experiences have been outstanding. I study both of these review boards and sometimes Cerb and Merb. I have enormous respect and appreciation for the ladies who provide these services and I think that shows when I'm together with them. I keep my reviews on every board very positive because there's always something-or many things-to celebrate in every date. Yes, I've had some disappointments, but nobody gets this right 100% of the time. That would include SPs who at times must be very surprised and disappointed with a guy that they thought would be really great. I want to say a special thanks to all who provide reviews that enable need to make good choices. And again, I would like to express my appreciation to the beautiful women-- you are amazing and I am thankful!

with all due respect, this is pretty self serving. Proclaiming 'I personally do not beat my wife' does not make domestic violence go away. We all, as men - and especially as clients, really ought to step up and take some responsibility for the often shameful tone of posts on these boards. Saying 'it wasn't me' isn't terribly helpful. Let's all own up a little and think hard before we press 'send'.

I spent a little time on the other board today, trying to get my head around the distinction. It's this:

"The rosey board attitude has not place here. Let's be adults and stop kissing asses like we're privileged to be in a lady's company. Christ."

Utter, complete, bullshit.

Regardless of whether or not an exchange is involved, I firmly believe I AM privileged to be in a lady's company.

To express appreciation is not kissing ass. This isn't a fast food drive through, and the attention and kindness of a woman is not a box of timbits.

I am deeply grateful to the handful of women who have brightened my world with their time and attention.

That isn't kissing ass. It's recognising that a privilege truly is a privilege.

I look at TERB on occasion, as the reviews there are sometimes a useful addition to what we have here (or more often, what we don't have here). TERB also allows discussion of services, which is useful if you want something specific and hasn't been allowed here since the laws changed. But having said that, I've never felt that it was an environment I really wanted to get involved in.

with all due respect, this is pretty self serving. Proclaiming 'I personally do not beat my wife' does not make domestic violence go away. We all, as men - and especially as clients, really ought to step up and take some responsibility for the often shameful tone of posts on these boards. Saying 'it wasn't me' isn't terribly helpful. Let's all own up a little and think hard before we press 'send'.

While I agree with the last part of your last sentence...not sure I am completely following your logic in this post. Are you suggesting that all members of the male gender take responsibility for the actions of others? That seems a bit broad and sweeping. I strongly condemn domestic violence of any kind, but I don't take responsibility if someone beats their wife, if I am a bystander to violence I will intervene, but to help a victim, not to take responsibility for the actions of others. By your logic should all men be incarcerated because there are some wife beaters amongst us?

I think the thought process is - if you see someone posting something that is nasty - instead of ignoring it, or worse, agreeing with it - do you say something? Do you call someone out if they have posted something that is potentially violent? Dangerous? Or, do you keep scrolling and do nothing? Again, I`m not referring to the comment `she wasn`t my cup of tea`. Its the comments like she`s a dog, she doesn`t deserve to be alive, she needs a shit kicking.

 

I still remember a post - someone had commented on a really attractive lady who worked in a retail store. She did not work in the industry. Enough information was made available for people to figure out where she worked. Comments were being made "yes, she is really hot, I'd bone her" etc, which meant these guys were actually going to her workplace to check her out. The thread was eventually closed, and identifying information was deleted. However, I was horrified. Her safety was put in jeopardy, and of course, because she is not part of this industry, knew nothing about the increased interest in her.

 

Of course, the ladies on the site could not comment on the thread. It was not about them, so therefore, they did not have a say in the matter. However, it did open my eyes to the ramifications of some that do not seem to understand the dangers they place others in by their inappropriate comments - and lack thereof.

Thanks for your thoughtful reply Meaghan, that makes more sense. For what it's worth, terb members will routinely call out other members for inappropriate posts, crude language, and I personally have never experienced anything violent or dangerous...but my experienece is limited to the Ottawa forums and subforums so certainly not a far reaching conclusion across the entire board.

I have stood up for one SP in particular on the other board whom need not be named and who visits here from time to time. The contention was that she had refused to provide some of the services that were laid out while texting. The man felt he had been short-changed, left after 15-20 when he had paid for 2 hrs. She had refused to do some services (not all) because she felt her health and safety at risk as the gentleman was apparently not fully hygienic....he claimed otherwise so it's difficult to say who was right or wrong...still i defended her choice because i believe that SP's have every right to bail out of a session and/or not provide some of the services offered if they feel their health or safety is at risk....i have never met her nor do i know the member who was adamant about being wronged. Nevertheless, i stood by her as i felt that the provider has every privilege to do what they feel is right for their well-being. Men in general feel entitled because they pay. Expectations are high and when things don't turn out they way they like, they sometimes voice their displeasure in a way that is not appropriate. So, yeah i was her 'White Knight' of the day but no one took it out on me, i clearly explained why and put no fault on either one. Guess i earned a little brownie point since she promised to contact me when she would be back because she wants to meet her defender...haha...

Still one must consider that as a paying customer, you expect a minimum. Chemistry is a word often used to legitimize whether a service is provided on par or not. I think that SP's should expect that they won't get 'chemistry' with every client, maybe even very few clients will have chemistry but it should change nothing in they way the SP provide their services. Should you decide to not live up to your commitments because you feel no 'chemistry' even if the man is a complete gentleman, clean as a whistle and respectful? You are either in it or not, you offer a service and get paid...the game plays both ways and it's not always the men's fault. Many providers are for a lack of a better word, frauds in disguise using B&S, making promises they never deliver on and in some distinct cases, are just out to take the money and run, hence the usefulness of both board...yes TERB is more liberal, some members do get banned at times for crossing the line, still a paying customer should have every right to voice is displeasure when he feels cheated as long as it's within an acceptable limit. It is difficult to do this here as the line is very thin, TERB allows that. Granted that some people go overboard, it is to be expected when the rules are more liberal...while i understand that Lyla is more of a recommendation platform, it should allow for some critical comments.

My disclaimer: i take no sides, some clients i'm sure are as horrible as Attila's while others are complete gentlemen, some providers are just BS and others are simply amazing, charming, sweet women who have dreams and aspirations like everyone else. I'll always show my respect to them because i can't begin to imagine how hard it must be at times. If i were a woman, i'm not sure i could do it quite frankly...it takes a lot of guts but i guess you get desensitized after a while

Do i make any sense here?....