Shy/socially anxious

I'm very shy and socially anxious. From what I read, it seems like you need to have some sort of chemistry to have a, *ahem*, good session with a woman. This worries me sort of. I'm very polite, reserved and non demanding. Not only am I afraid I'll be too awkward and shy and end up making the lady feel bad, but I'm not sure I'd be able to specify my needs, if that makes sense.

Mind you, I'm very young and a complete noob in the world of escorts, so please forgive me if I've said something wrong.

I have a final and sort of strange question, what if someone isn't interested in anything except for breast play? Is that okay?

It is an escorts job to make you feel comfortable and make you feel at ease. A lot of us are really good at this.

As a person who struggles with being shy and anxious I know first hand how debilitating this is. A lot of people have no idea that I struggle with this because I put myself out there all the time. I put myself in situations that pull me out of my comfort zone so I can grow as a person and get past being shy and anxious. By placing this post you are doing just that. Don't let fear hold you back and debilitate your life. You only get one life, So carpe diem.

I would take your time. Read some reviews/threads. There is no rush to doing this. Us escorts will be here for awhile. So that when you see an escort you are ready and happy to play.

As companions we are here to entertain you. Sex is secondary, to me anyways. It's always a good idea to let escorts know what your wishes are and they will surly be okey with breast play.

Good luck, Hun.

Great advise from very nice young courtesan. :-)

You'll find that the ladies are very good at putting you at ease.

For what it's worth I get a nervous excitement (if that's the right way to put it) every time I have an encounter with a lady, whether it's a lady I'm meeting for the first time, or I'm seeing for a repeat encounter

Tell the lady you plan to see that you are shy. And be honest with her, treat her with respect, like a gentleman. Tell her you are interested in breast play.

When she shows up at your hotel (or you at her place) she'll know what your looking for.

Enjoy the encounter in entirety, let it unfold naturally. As for chemistry, that develops when you get to know the lady, and she gets to know you

Good luck

RG

...Mind you, I'm very young and a complete noob in the world of escorts

Well if it provides you any comfort, I'm not young and probably the complete opposite of you in many ways. That said, I am envious of your youth and inexperience; oh what I wouldn't give to be able to discover and learn it all over again, what a wonderful journey you can have ahead of you with the right attitude.

There is really only two things you need to do. Find a nice SP and communicate your true desires which even if you are shy and socially anxious should not be too much of a problem, especially via email or PMs and make an appointment. In fact I know that won't be a problem as you just told the world so you should easily be able to tell that to a nice SP via private messages or email and a bit more.

When you find someone you seem to connect with, the only other hurdle is actually showing up in person. While I'm counting the days, hours and minutes and can't wait I fully understand the anxiety some experience. If she has a good reputation then pre-paying can take some of the anxiety out of it but this may be the most difficult part is to actually take the leap of faith and show up in person.

Once you've accomplished that, you can just relax and enjoy as you'll be in good hands with any reputable CERB lady.

Although I haven't had the supreme pleasure of meeting her in person, from what has been reported Peachy seems very good with newbies :) I was touched reading some of her recommendations, have a look.

 

Although I haven't had the supreme pleasure of meeting her in person, from what has been reported Peacy seems very good with newbies :) I was touched reading some of her recommendations, have a look.

I can attest to this.

There is a thread talking about first times with an SP that might give you insight of what you might be going into. I know some are horror stories, but I think if you do your research, and possibly stick to Cerb, you won't be let down - http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=87056

Don't worry too much about being nervous. That's normal, but I would recommend communicating with whichever SP you are interested in. And while you have your entire life to live out any fantasies you have, I suggest asking the SP to lead, and just get comfortable with your situation. Like Peachy said, escorts are VERY good at this. I'm still very very new at this, and I reminisce fondly with my encounter and can't wait for future ones.

As for the breast play part, this forum is awesome in that if you are respectful and courteous, no one will judge you.

And I think you have what most if not all SPs are looking for in a client when you said you are polite (if I may be so bold to speak for them)

I'm also very shy/socially awkward. I've only visited MPs/MAs but they clearly picked up on my shyness and were super nice and good at easing me into the experience and getting me to open up a bit. I'm sure if you look around and communicate with a lady who's active on the forums and has a lot of good recommendations you'll end up having a good time.

And let her know you're a shy person, so she knows what to expect and can treat you properly so you both have a good time.

In my experience, men who are shy or socially anxious frequently make wonderful clients! Not to generalize excessively, most of them are very sensitive, perceptive fellows who very much want the encounter to be satisfying for both of us and are concerned that not knowing me might increase the likelihood that they'll do something wrong or upset me in some way. Far from it!

On the whole, things can be much more difficult with the guys who present themselves as extremely confident, experienced and worldly because they don't always listen well, pay attention or read physical or social cues.

If you feel shy or anxious, do tell your companion. She will want to know, for sure! As the others have said, we're good at helping people feel comfortable. Maybe you'd like to be seduced? That can be a great way to know for sure that everything you do is good for her!

It is an escorts job to make you feel comfortable and make you feel at ease. A lot of us are really good at this.

 

As a person who struggles with being shy and anxious I know first hand how debilitating this is. A lot of people have no idea that I struggle with this because I put myself out there all the time. I put myself in situations that pull me out of my comfort zone so I can grow as a person and get past being shy and anxious. By placing this post you are doing just that. Don't let fear hold you back and debilitate your life. You only get one life, So carpe diem.

 

I would take your time. Read some reviews/threads. There is no rush to doing this. Us escorts will be here for awhile. So that when you see an escort you are ready and happy to play.

 

As companions we are here to entertain you. Sex is secondary, to me anyways. It's always a good idea to let escorts know what your wishes are and they will surly be okey with breast play.

 

Good luck, Hun.

Great advice Peachy and very well said luv!

I know exactly where your coming from Canuck. Shyness and anxiety are something I have been dealing with for most of my life, and I will admit that there are times that I have skipped out on things because of it and to this day I regret it. Like Peachy said sometimes the best thing you can do is look your fears in the face, and hey you usually end up finding out that it wasn't as bad as you though it would be. You don't want to skip out on things because they make you anxious, trust me on this. And I can say from experience there is not many things better than being greeted at the door by a beautiful young lady :)

What made things easier for me was just getting to know the Cerb community better, reading posts on the forums, and reading recommendations from members you recognize on the forums. I especially found it useful to read the posts of the ladies on the forums as that can help give you a a better idea of a ladies personality and help you decide which lady you would like to visit. Recommendations by themselves do provide you with a lot of useful information but I just found that when a lady is active on the forums it can just provide you with that extra little bit of info that can help you decide.

The best thing you can do though is talk to the lady your interested in. That can be the best way to see if she really is the one you want to see. Talk about the weather, talk about mutual interests, but mainly be honest. I found that being honest just made things easier as it took away that extra pressure. And as for special requests, I wouldn't worry about it. I'm sure there are more than a couple of ladies that would cater to your taste, but the best way to find out is too talk to the ladies. They won't bite...unless you ask them too, lol. And hey if you have any questions you can always post them on the forums or pm some members, if your more comfortable with that, and we'd be more than happy to answer them.

Good luck on your quest Canuck :)

I still get a bit nervous (or maybe more anxious and excited) when seeing a lady for the first time. I actually much prefer contact by e-mail, as calling someone up cold, and hearing her voice on the phone, is something I find hard to do. No problem calling once we've exchanged e-mails and chatted electronically a bit.

To the OP, I'd simply say in your introductory e-mail that you're very shy, and nervous about the whole experience. I'm sure you will get a very reassuring e-mail that will help put you at ease.

In the long run, if you are shy with women, seeing an escort may very well help you develop the confidence that you are, in fact, a great guy, with lots of good qualities, and the ability to interact with and please a woman. Learn from the ladies you see in this biz, and I fully expect that when you interact with civilian women, they will respond to the changes in you. And when they meet you in the bedroom, they'll likely find out there is a lot more that lies behind the shy exterior than perhaps they expected. :icon_wink:

Porthos

Wow, thanks for all the nice and thoughtful replies. You've all certainly helped put my mind at ease. Great community you guys have here. :)

Curious

Like most have said, make sure you write a little note about yourself to the lady you choose for your special nite, this way she will know a little about you, what makes you apprehensive, what you enjoy and so on.

it never hurts to be open and upfront about your feelings or things you fear, it will make for a better time for yourself and the person you are with.

Above all else, relax and enjoy yourself, if you take the proper approach to this hobby, it can be a lot of fun and a rewarding experience.

Just be yourself....... ;-)

SNK

As you said, "I'm very polite, reserved and non demanding." -- politeness goes a looooong way!

Just don't be too shy in letting the SP know what it is you like (and what it is you don't like). I was reading over some of the other posts and a lot of them already said what has to be said. As an SP, I receive a lot of emails/questions, but if they are flat out rude in how they go about approaching the subject it may turn me off and I may not even want to see them. Establishing the initial contact as someone who is professional and polite is key (for me anyways)!

So, just be your polite, nice self and you will go far and have a truly amazing experience with an SP of your choice!

Take care

Kerri

I am also very shy and as i find more and more there are alot of sps out there that are the same. One of the greatest feelings is to be able to put someone else at ease and be able to enjoy exploring what each other likes and dislikes are. I think shyness makes you more aware of the person you are with there reactions to your touch.